ENTRY 1: "I could care less."

Well, if you could care LESS, then it is implied that you currently care to some degree, idjit. The correct phrase is: "I couldn't care less." Get it right.

ENTRY 2: "He's going to try and hit the target (por ejemplo)."

Let's break this down - - he's going to try the target. AND he's going to hit the target. Whuhhhhh? The correct phrase is: "He's going to try to hit the target."

ENTRY 3: Anything spoken by George Dubya Bush, who is the personification of linguistic irritants and, indeed, all irritants of every variety.



How about YOU? Any particular turn of phrase or word that gets under your skin?



READER CONTRIBUTIONS:

From BigChris: morons that punctuate everything with "you know what I'm saying?"

From SherrysCherries: Yeah, people who use the F word as both an adjective and adverb for everything.

Example:

I was out F-ing walking my f-ing dog and some f-ing dude in a f-ing suv almost f-ing ran us the f over.

From The Vessel: I fucking hate the fucking word "irregardless". You know what I'm fucking saying?

Regardless means without regard. Add the prefix ir to that and you get not without regard, a double negative contained in a single word that people use to mean the opposite of what it ends up meaning. I wish people would at least try and use it right.

Eh, now that I fucking think about it, I could care less, you know what I'm saying?

NUCULER!

From ColoConnect: I know a woman that constantly uses "unremarkable" ...not a word not a phrase just an annoyance.

I hate it when some friends and family use "flusterated" or "flusteration" again not a word........it's the place that frustration meets flurry and it's an ugly place....

From NotACynic: Do overused words and expressions count? Because, "at the end of the day", If I hear the word "unbelievable" as an all-purpose adjective even once more I will lose my fucking mind. Also "official" as in Coors light is an official sponsor of some fucking shit.

From ZappaFan: Anything that comes out of Fran Dresher's mouth.

Extreme redneck speak, not Southern mind you, to me there is a difference.

Extreme New York speak, being from New York and not talking like that anymore (unless I spend time there) it makes me nuts.

Very Gay Germans, I do not have a problem with gays or Germans but if you put that lispy thing with that gutteral talk aaarrrgghhh!

Grown men and women that use the terms dawg and dude in an attempt to seem 'with it'

From TheBlaast: Let me try and hit the target. Irregardless of the fucking comments on this fucking post dawg, at the end of the day everyone uses language that is flusterating to others. Know what I'm saying,dude?
Please don't misunderestimate how much I could care less. Unbelievable!

From Adam Warlock: I guess "wanna come with" is the only thing I can think of. Not particularly that phrase, but the lack of people completing the sentance.

"I'm gonna go get a beer. You wanna come with?" (ME!)

And it's pronounced i-ther or ni-ther, not either of neither. 8-)

From Daisy: A well-timed and well-placed vulgarity can say volumes in the right situations. But I really hate to hear it in every day use, such as the word "shit" to mean "stuff."

From Bupu2: Pronouncing the word "chimney" as "chimley" is guaranteed to make me say/do most all the above.

From BigAl: One of my brothers would use the word "phenomenal" all the time. It would drive everyone in the family crazy.

A phrase I try not to use is "the thing is", although I do. I know that drives some people nuts. My dad would use that when he was making a point, so I guess I picked it up from him.

From Whispered Promise: I pronounce room, broom,and roof in short vowels and my New Jersy relatives and my Marylander friends mock it, but dang it, there is now r in the first sylable of water. Nor does it sound like wooder.
As far as phrases, My teens call each other "butt hole" and I hate that. I don't care what they say, it never will be an endearment!

From AZRon: Do you 'wash' your clothes or 'warsh' your clothes?

I never got used to 'warshing' my clothes, I'll stick with laundering them

And more from The Vessel: The Monkitty has informed me that he hates it when people use 'then' when they should use 'than', por ejemplo, "Vessel is more smarter then anyone else in the world". (Monkitty does not realize that 'more smarter' is improper grammar. He's just a monkitty for crying out loud.) This seems to happen most often in written language, which begs the questions, "When did the Monkitty learn to read?" and "Does Monkitty have a shot at the Republican presidential nomination?"

And Chanda has some more: "at the end of the day" and "it is what it is". Can you tell that I have been listening to the corporate language for too long? Then add that lingo with a boss that thought the "s" is especially was an "x"....another one that crawls under my skin.

But boy do a love the word Fuck.....for all occasions

Remind me to ask, the next time I dine out: "Do you have a non-Republican section?"





And do you ever watch couples out together in a restaurant? Old marrieds are particularly fascinating - - too often, they sit silently on opposite sides of the booth, speaking only to give their orders. The silence continues as they fork the vittles in - - eyes on the plate or the distance, never on each other, even as they get up and walk to the door. Not a word.

Either they're beyond conversation or they have nothing left to say. I fear it's the latter, but I hope for the former.

Today, though, I watched an older couple who were quite chatty - - nice to see.

Sometimes it's fun to observe young couples of all varieties in an effort to figure out what stage they're in - - first date? several dates into a new relationship? seriously dating? engaged? newly married? married for a while?

One last question spawned from the restaurant people-watching field studies: At what age exactly do women decide to get the frumpy 'do? Is there some sort of biological alarm that goes off, alerting a woman that it's time to shear off the locks and get the hair helmet? Is there some way that I can disarm that alarm?



"Portrait of an Elderly Lady"
Mary Cassatt

Been in Boston the last few days at a social norms conference - - and I come home to THIS:



Axe murderer? Or just the wasband, coming for a visit timed to coincide with the release of the latest Harry Potter book at his former bookstore here in Colorado? You make the call. I'm voting axe murderer.

My new favorite political organization:



After Dubya turned out to be a liberal prison reformer, intent on commuting the sentences of ALL nonviolent convicted felons (well, he's getting a slow start), I just didn't think the world could get any better.

But now I've found an organization that combines drinking with political discussion, thus legitimizing one of my secret favorite hobbies.

Drinking Liberally

But remember - - don't drink and vote. I'm fairly sure that's how we got in the current situation.

No, we're not talkin' Vespa at no cost - - "Free Scooter" is Dubya's latest move in his "How Can I Be Even MORE Out of Touch with the Will of the People?" campaign, which is going very well.

I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby - - nicknames are a requirement of the Dubya FratHouse - - was convicted of, what, FOUR felonies in relation to the outting of covert CIA operative Valerie Plame? For his participation in efforts to subvert the investigation into the leak of Plame's name, Scooter was convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice. He was sentenced to two and a half years in prison for his felony offenses.

Now Dubya has commuted Scooter's sentence to probation because in HIS view - - as a highly trained attorney or judge or......well, as someone who has watched "Law and Order" lots of times - - the sentence is "too harsh".

TOO HARSH?????


(A scene from "Driving Mr. Libby")

Did Dubya say "too harsh" in relation to a prison sentence? This from the former Tay-hass governor who executed inmate after inmate during his reign, including a number of people who were intellectually disabled based on IQ or mental health diagnosis? This from the sitting lame-duck president who has authorized the holding WITHOUT DUE PROCESS of hundreds of people of many different nationalities at Guantanamo Bay detention facility for YEARS - - no trials, no convictions, just endless holding without legal justification?

And 2.5 years in prison is too harsh for Scooter?

I can hear the rationalizers now, parroting the junk about Scooter being a fall guy and his felony offenses not being of the ilk that would endanger the public, blah blah blah rhetoric rhetoric rhetoric.

Let's look at the FACTS:

1) Scooter is the first administration member to be convicted of a FELONY since the '80s, when a number of people with mall hair were convicted in the Iran-Contra scandal.

2) Common people, who don't have a private legal defense fund or deep-pocket political allies, are frequently sent to prison on similar class felonies (burglary, criminal trespass, etc.). Poor people, and particularly people of color, are frequently sent to prison for misdemeanor offenses such as drug crimes and 3rd Degree Assault - - KIDS are frequently sentenced to two years in prison for much lesser offenses than Scooter's four felonies.

3) That bears repeating: FOUR FELONIES.

4) And were they victimless? Not at all. Plame was a covert operative in the CIA, meaning that she kept her employment with the Company concealed from all but a very trusted few so that she could achieve her objectives. (Now, the utility of undercover CIA operations in today's world is another, discrete discussion, so let's table that.) Scooter's cohorts leaked her identity to the media, which dutifully published it, compromising Plame's safety as well as the safety of any of her contacts. Scooter's cohorts did this as a way of shutting down Plame's husband, who was critical of the Bush administration's stated motivations for the war in Iraq - - what kind of logic is THAT? Deep breath. OK, so Scooter's role was preventing investigators from closing in on and indicting the leakers of the Plame info - - he was an accessory after the fact, in "Law and Order" lingo.

5) Scooter was found guilty in a court of law; he not only received the same due process available to almost any other U.S. citizen (apparently Gitmo is a due-process-free zone - - don't think about it), but he also had the very best defense that $$$$$$$$$$ and connections can buy. And he was still found guilty. The odds are that he was guilty of participating in a crime that endangered the lives of Valerie Plame and the contacts she cultivated in her operative role.

And yet his prison sentence was commuted by Dubya, during a time when we have MUCH bigger fish to fry - - U.S. and Iraqi lives ending every minute overseas, genocide and repression occurring in our country and others, U.S. debt accumulating without cease, the poor getting poorer across the U.S., the failure of our country to participate meaningfully in efforts to slow the destruction of our natural resources, and so much more. Bush decides that his priority issue, the one he has to jump on with alacrity, is convicted felon Scooter Libby's sentence commutation.

Unconvicted detainees rot in Gitmo and commit suicide at a rate far higher than the general populace - - and Dubya commutes Scooter's sentence.

Have we had enough yet? Just say when.



* NOTE: I'm not in favor of prison time for most offenses; there is almost certainly a community-based house arrest program that would work just swell for the vast majority of offenders, including Scooter. BUT, what burns me about this situation is the inconsistency and exclusivity so often demonstrated by the Bush administration. This is absolutely disgusting.